My love

April. 24, 2008. One of my best friends form my old school and I start going out. We live in different states, but I don't care. I love her more than anyone else.

Early June, 2008. My love is grounded from the phone, for the entire summer break. I cannot talk to her, but I never forget her. The longer she is grounded, the more I fear that she does not love me anymore.

August, 2008. She is finally ungrounded, and I am incredibly happy, but I am afraid to tell her, because it appears my fears have been realized. It is painfully apparent she has lost the spark. No matter how many times I try to go see her, she always says she is doing something, but we always find time to talk on the phone.

December, 2008. I am crushed. She has fallen in love with another guy. She will not shut up about him, but I am afraid to tell her not to talk about him. I do not want her to hide a part of her life from me. I fear more and more that she loves him more than me.

Late February, 2009. She breaks up with me. I was crushed, beyond all words. I don’t even think she knows. I still wanted to be friends, yet I can't even talk to her because it hurts. She continuously tells me about him, because I am afraid to tell her that it hurts. I just want her to do what makes her happy, regardless of my feelings.

March, 2009. She finds that the man she thought she loved was using her to cheat on his girlfriend, because she looked better than the girl that was his, and his girl was out of town on a missionary trip. She gives him all but what he wants, and I am happy that she wouldn’t.

April 29, 2009. She asked me if I still wanted to go out with her, and I said yes, although I knew that she didn’t love me like I loved her. It was foolish.

Early May, 2009. I find out that she has a crush on my best friend. I make the mistake of three-way calling both of them, and I regretted it. Early the next week, I tried it again, and they said something that I wish hadn’t been said. The next day, I broke up with her. I was tired of the heartache, and I thought I could end it fast. It worked, for one day. Then I regretted it with my whole heart.

June, 2009. I lose contact with both of them for about 2 months.

Early August, 2009. My friend calls me, and within a week, I spend the night at his house. I was so happy to finally have contact with him, and that gave me hope of her calling me.

August 28, 2009. She calls, but it’s not good news. I find out that while I lost contact, that my friend got kicked out of his house, moved in with her, they…did…what boys and girls do when they live together…then my friend got let back into his house. It turns out he got her pregnant.

August 30, 2009. My friend moves in with her, and they are currently engaged. I still love her deeply. It is horrifying, knowing that I can never have her.

September 1, 2009. There was an accident. She was helping move risers for her show choir, and one dropped on her stomach. That same day, her period starred. I was horrified, yet, relieved that she didnt have this to wory about. Her life probably would have been changed for the worse, had this happened. I wish, though, that the baby hadn’t been killed. I don't know what to think

September 2, 2009. My best friend abandons her. He leaves, the day he finds out, and refuses to pick up her calls. I am utterly shocked, and I can’t believe him.

September 6, 2009. I am talking to her for about 2 hours, while my bros play at the park. We start talking about him, because she is depressed. About 30 minutes into the conversation, she is actually very happy. She tells me that I always make her feel better when she is upset, and tells me she still loves me deeply.

September 7, 2009. She breaks up with him, and so I asked her out. I really didn’t care what had happened, because we are together, Even if I haven’t seen her in over 2 years. We plan to go see each other on the 13th.